My History

Back then, in middle school, I thought I had it all. I was on top of the food chain. I had my friends along side with me. We conquered. But time was passing by and we knew that one day it would all end. So we lived our young lives to the fullest. Everywhere I went, my best friend was there with me, attached to my hip. We watched movies, partied, chilled and laughed. Life back then was so priceless.

8th grade graduation came. That was a night for joy, but also with tears. For the next school year, we would be attending different places. My best friends and I promised eachother that we would be best friends forever, that we would be sisters for life. For the rest of summer we chatted because we had nothing else to do. Lol.

Freshman year started. And of course, I started out looking like the typical freshman: big backpack; baggy clothes; lunch pale. But other than that, school was getting too busy with all the homework and projects we did. It caused me to lose connection with my girls. The more andmore I got into the high school gig, the less I'd talk to my friends. We used to talk everyday, to once in a while, to no response. It pained me.

During that year, I had no choice but to chill with one of my old school friends. She seemed to be quite the popular one and I thought I could have some of that. As I sat at their lunch table, I thought something was wrong. It felt weird to sit there, but I would sit there all the time! Then one day, it hit me. I don't belong here. What the fudge am I doing, sitting with a bunch of girls I have nothing in common with? No offense to them, they are my homies, but I had to sit somewhere else. So then i moved to another table. It was ok, better. But it hasn't filled that hole of where my old friends used to be. I MISSED THEM LIKE HELL. Freshman year ended. I thought of what had happened in the past year and felt like it was a pretty good year. Little did I know what was in for me at sophomore year.

I started sophomore year fresh. Still wishing I was with my home girls. But I knew.. it ain't gonna happen. I would always think about it, the promise we made. In that promise, we said we wouldn't move on. We'd always argue about that topic. I regret that that ever happened...



New classes, and a couple new people. I chose to return to my lunch table. It was strange, I started to talk less and less in the crowd. It was like I didn't fit in anymore. I had no one to talk to. I was left out. Sometimes, I would see my old school friend, as I said earlier, but she wouldn't be much in the mood to hang with me. And when I did hang out with her, I wouldn't pay much attention to her conversation. NO OFFENSE, LOL. My mind just wanders off.



At first, I'd feel all depressed because I had no real friends. I missed my old life so much, that I got so angry on the inside. My mom always asked me why I'm so cranky, she thought maybe I was just hungry. I avoided going to school too early and tried to leave right away. It was hell, and I thought it wasn't going to get better.



BUT soon enough, I met this guy in one of my classes. Some tall, asian guy with a spiky haircut. Eh. I thought he was really chill at first, definetly funny. I didn't mind him much, my anger blocked all feelings. This one really hot day was the day my teacher came late to class. We stood outside waiting for her. I was quite irritated. But I noticed this one thing. The tall asian guy was doing something strange with his feet. I was thinking 'What's he doing?...' I laughed. He tried to glide with his feet. (x

"What are you doing?" I finally asked him.

He looked, laughed sheepishly, and said, "I'm trying to glide."

HA! I showed him. I glided him out! That was a funny day. A week later, he comes in and glides me out. Dude, wtf?xD LAME.

So this dude, who likes to glide away, starts being all "nice" to me. It's cool. Still, I didn't mind it. I was still a loner, but he never realized it. I guess one day, when I saw him and his friend, I walked over to his lunch table. Honestly, I don't like meeting new people. It terrified me. It was weird at the beginning because I don't talk to these people that much. But they are so deng funny, I just laughed and laughed. I started to sit there everyday and talk to them. I like to consider them my new friends.

Now, I always want to get to school early and stay after school late so I can chill with my friends longer. This is my group, my fun, my place. I have so much in common with these people. It's a never ending roller coaster of fun. I know that I haven't been able to have this much fun since... before high school. They are my dim light. xD

I have found my way through the high school playground. I never thought I could make it out. But my friends and I can conquer. Soon enough, I'll be back on top of the food chain. Through time, I realize that people come and go, and even though they're gone, I still have my memories and I still have my own life to live. I can't keep trying to live in the past, because I'm missing out on the present.

~iJACEY~021609